Merry Melodies
by thinkpink23
Summary: A collection of original songs. Rainbow Dash and Trixie fighting over who's got the worst job? Apple Bloom telling Applejack about all the monsters not only under the bed, but also in the closet and the toybox? Will probably run a poll for song requests.
1. I Hate My Job

RAINBOW DASH:  
Ugh. I HATE. My job...

FLUTTERSHY:  
Really?

RAINBOW DASH:  
YES, really! You're real lucky you don't have to take any of the weather shifts.

FLUTTERSHY:  
Oh, yes, I find that taking care of all the little creatures is much more-

RAINBOW DASH:  
Phooey on the little creatures! What I'm talking about are all the stupid ponies at work and how my life could be put to much more important things!

FLUTTERSHY:  
Like what?

(Music starts)

RAINBOW DASH:  
Every day I go to Cloudsdale  
Because I have no choice  
They make me do things that demand things  
Like my smarts, my strength, my voice

FLUTTERSHY:  
Well, that isn't so bad, I mean, it's sort of-

RAINBOW DASH:  
Clear the clouds!  
Make some snowflakes!  
Oh, go and make it rain!  
Put more clouds in!  
Stop the snow!  
It REALLY is a pain!

And then after they give me all those lousy instructions, you know what they do?

FLUTTERSHY:  
Well, um-  
RAINBOW DASH:  
They give me MORE lousy instructions and then they start criticizing me!

(reaches offscreen and puts on a pair of spectacles and holds a clipboard)

You left some clouds above town hall,  
Your snowflakes are a wreck  
You were five minutes late to work yesterday,  
We'll take that off your check!

(tosses the spectacles and clipboard offscreen)

Okay, haha, I guess I made just one TEENSY little mistake...  
But seriously, nopony's perfect!  
Can't they just give a girl a break?!

FLUTTERSHY:  
Well, if you ask me, maybe you could-

RAINBOW DASH:  
Every day I wish I could just  
Sleep in, eat, just relax!  
That's why I LOVE my days off  
But I only get two a week! Those are FACTS!

So instead I'm left getting bossed aaall day...  
Why can't I do my own thing?!  
I don't even get good pay!

FLUTTERSHY:  
Well, I'm sorry you feel that way, Rainbow Dash, but, um...

(TRIXIE enters screen and bumps into FLUTTERSHY)

TRIXIE:  
Hey! Watch it, low-life, the Great and Powerful Trixie's walking here!

FLUTTERSHY:  
Oh! I am SO sorry...

RAINBOW DASH:  
Watch it yourself, punk! This is my pal, and I was just complaining to her about how much I hate my job! Now scram and leave us alone so I can continue my complaining!

TRIXIE:  
(sniffs) You think YOUR job is bad? Trixie is sure it's NOTHING compared to what TRIXIE has to endure. Why...

Every week Trixie has to travel  
To a new town for her show  
Your "Twilight" smashed her trailer!  
So Trixie walks. It's truly difficult, you know!

(FLUTTERSHY looks TRIXIE up and down, recognizing her wizard costume)

FLUTTERSHY:  
But...um...aren't you a magician? Couldn't you just use magic to-

TRIXIE:  
Don't interrupt!

Trixie can amaze them  
For two minutes  
And then they start to groan  
They throw vegetables  
And tell her she's not  
The greatest pony ever known!

RAINBOW DASH:  
Um, you're not.

TRIXIE:  
Can it, rainbow-colored abomination!

And yet Trixie still must carry on,  
Continue with her tricks.  
After all, it's a known fact that victory  
Doesn't come without a few licks!

So still Trixie performs her magic shows...  
Trixie may make her claim to fame!  
Might even be today, who knows!

RAINBOW DASH:  
The day YOU make your claim to fame is the day after forever, Great and Powerful Lamehead. MY job is the one that sucks!

TRIXIE:  
Oh really?

RAINBOW DASH:  
Yeah, really!

Every day I go to Cloudsdale  
Because I have no choice  
They make me do things that demand things  
Like my smarts, my strength, my voice!

TRIXIE:  
Every week Trixie has to travel  
To a new town for her show  
Your "Twilight" smashed her trailer!  
So she walks. It's truly difficult, you know!

RAINBOW DASH:  
I have to paint the rainbows!

TRIXIE:  
Trixie must perform her stunts!

RAINBOW DASH:  
I get to craft the lightning, yay!

TRIXIE:  
Trixie's assistants are schoolboy runts!

RAINBOW DASH:  
I hate my job!

TRIXIE:  
I hate my life!

RAINBOW DASH:  
Go to work? I think I'd rather swallow a knife!

FLUTTERSHY:  
Um, can we keep this non-violent please?

TRIXIE:  
Most of the towns Trixie visits have fleas!

(with this last statement, the music fades and RAINBOW DASH and FLUTTERSHY back away awkwardly)

RAINBOW DASH:  
...Oookaaay...

(The music starts back up again as RAINBOW DASH begins to sing)

RAINBOW DASH:  
Clear the clouds!  
Make some snowflakes!  
Oh, go and make it rain!  
Put more clouds in!  
Stop the snow!  
It REALLY is a pain!

TRIXIE:  
I can amaze them  
For two minutes  
And then they start to groan  
They throw vegetables  
And tell me I'm not  
The greatest pony ever known!

RAINBOW DASH:  
So instead I'm left getting-

FLUTTERSHY:  
Oh my! I have to go...

RAINBOW DASH:  
Really? But I just started ranting to you!

FLUTTERSHY:  
Oh, um, I'm sorry, but that will have to wait...I have to go feed the tigers and give the skunks a bath...

TRIXIE:  
T-tigers?

RAINBOW DASH:  
Skunks?

FLUTTERSHY:  
Oh, yes...and I also have to clean the monkey cages, play with the piranhas, make sure the bears are happy, brush the lions' manes, and wash the roof of the chicken coop...

RAINBOW DASH:  
...The roof?

FLUTTERSHY:  
Yes, it's where the birds like to-well, um...they happen to be attracted to the-the roof. Um-they...you know...on the...the roof...

(RAINBOW DASH and TRIXIE exchange glances)

RAINBOW DASH:  
Y'know, I think I'm gonna go see if there's anything else I can do for the weather team.

TRIXIE:  
Trixie better prepare for her next show...

(RAINBOW DASH and TRIXIE exit the screen as FLUTTERSHY watches)

FLUTTERSHY:  
I love my job! (giggles lightly)

(FLUTTERSHY exits screen as it fades black)


	2. Monsters, Creatures, and Odd Things

APPLEJACK:  
G'night, Apple Bloom!

APPLE BLOOM:  
Night, sis!

(APPLEJACK turns to leave but is stopped by APPLE BLOOM)

APPLE BLOOM:  
Um…Applejack?

APPLEJACK:  
Yeah?

APPLE BLOOM:  
…Can y'all check my room for monsters?

APPLEJACK:  
(sighs) Apple Bloom, you're too old for this kinda stuff. There ain't no monsters.

(APPLEJACK turns to leave again, but APPLE BLOOM grabs her by the tail)

APPLE BLOOM:  
No, I swear, sis! There's monsters everywhere! They only just come out whenever y'all leave the room! They're all just waitin' to pounce on me! How'll you like it when y'all come back in the mornin' and find your little sister chewed up to bits by the monsters?

APPLEJACK:  
Apple Bloom. Bed. Now.

(APPLEJACK turns to leave a third time, slightly irritated, but APPLE BLOOM stops her)

APPLE BLOOM:  
No! All you grownups don't understand…

There's a creature in my closet  
With eyes that glow like flames  
With big sharp teeth and big sharp claws  
He rips and kills and maims!

APPLEJACK:  
I'm sure. Now will y'all just settle down and get to—

APPLE BLOOM:  
And there's somethin' under the bed  
With pointy horns he's dark and red  
I swear one night I heard he said  
He'll tear my flesh and eat my head!

(APPLE BLOOM puts on a justified look and APPLEJACK shudders slightly)

APPLEJACK:  
Heh. That's a lot of hooey.

APPLE BLOOM:  
No, it ain't! It's all true, cross my heart! And that's not even all of it, you wanna hear the rest?

APPLEJACK:  
Not particularly.

(APPLEJACK starts to leave the room, but APPLE BLOOM stops her as she passes the toybox)

APPLE BLOOM:  
Applejack! NO!

(APPLEJACK, startled, trips up on herself and slips, sprawling backwards while APPLE BLOOM continues)

APPLE BLOOM:  
In that toybox there's an odd thing  
That makes a funny noise  
It squeaks and growls, it laughs so strange  
It can't poss'bly be my toys!

(Suddenly a muffled maniacal laugh emanates from the toybox, causing APPLEJACK to jump up and yelp in surprise)

APPLEJACK:  
Whoa nelly!

(The laugh stops after a moment or two, and APPLEJACK slowly nears the toybox, the music growing tense. APPLEJACK carefully reaches her hoof out and with a small flick throws open the toybox, cowering immediately. A jack-in-the-box pops out of the toybox and laughs maniacally. APPLEJACK looks up sheepishly, realizing she let her sister's talk fool her mind, and laughs nervously.)

APPLEJACK:  
Why, it's just that old jack-in-the-box you had when you were little, Apple Bloom! It's probably broken, jus' listen to that thing cackle…

(Right after saying this APPLEJACK bucks the jack-in-the-box against the wall violently, smashing it, obviously miffed that she was so afraid of a child's toy.)

APPLE BLOOM:  
Well, the way that the odd thing laughed sounded different than that old jack-in-the-box…

(APPLEJACK looks shocked for a second, but quickly recovers)

APPLEJACK:  
Ya don't say? (puts on a sarcastic tone) Now, is there any other monster dwellin' places that I should look out for on my way out the door?

APPLE BLOOM:  
Well, y'all might wanna watch out as you go by that window over there…

APPLEJACK:  
Oh really? What's up with your window?

APPLE BLOOM:  
Oh…well, I don't think y'all wanna hear about the window…

APPLEJACK:  
Why not?

APPLE BLOOM:  
The window, well, it ain't as nice as the closet creature or the bed monster…

(APPLEJACK is obviously growing more curious and more worried as she pries on APPLE BLOOM)

APPLEJACK:  
Tell me.

APPLE BLOOM:  
Well…

APPLEJACK:  
Tell me!

APPLE BLOOM:  
I…I don't know…

APPLEJACK:  
Just tell me, Apple Bloom! I'm your big sister, for pony's sake!

(APPLE BLOOM, realizing that she won't be able to put up a fight, takes a breath)

APPLE BLOOM:  
Look through my window at night  
And what you'll see gives you a fright  
A pony with his face all white  
And gleaming eyes that glare so bright

He tries to open my window  
But I'm so glad he doesn't know  
That every night before you go  
You lock the window so, just so

(APPLEJACK is obviously now worried, and shows it in her tone of voice, which goes a bit hoarse)

APPLEJACK:  
Y-you mean that…every night y'all have been seein' a creepy pony tryin' to open your window?

APPLE BLOOM:  
Eeyup!

(APPLEJACK, realizing that APPLE BLOOM could be lying, frowns and leans closer in towards her sister.)

APPLEJACK:  
Apple Bloom, are you tellin' falsehoods?

APPLE BLOOM:  
Eenope!

APPLEJACK:  
W-well, how come you never said anythin' about it to me o-o-or Big Macintosh?!

APPLE BLOOM:  
Y'all keep sayin' I'm too old for monsters!

APPLEJACK:  
Well this is different! You could be in danger!

(APPLE BLOOM's eyes go wide and she gasps, pointing to the window. APPLEJACK turns, her eyes also going wide in fear, and she steps in front of her sister protectively. What looks vaguely like a white face swaying in the wind can be seen from the window. APPLEJACK cringes and hides her face, but then looks up, frowns, and steps closer to the window to get a closer look.)

APPLEJACK:  
Now wait just a minute…that's no creepy pony tryin' to break into your bedroom, that's just that kite Rainbow Dash lost last week! It must have ended up in that there tree that's swayin' back and forth—see? All this rain we've been havin' musta washed the colors clean off, 'cept for those two little spots y'all called "gleamin' eyes"…

APPLE BLOOM:  
Well, I can see clear as anythin' that that's a kite! What I saw was different!

(APPLEJACK seems to be a little tired of being frightened out of her wits and gives APPLE BLOOM a worn-out, skeptical look.)

APPLEJACK:  
Monsters or not, y'all just go to sleep… Nothin' can hurt ya, I promise.

APPLE BLOOM:  
B-but Applejack! The monsters…

(APPLEJACK, now having had the most she can take with the "monsters", turns on APPLE BLOOM angrily.)

APPLEJACK:  
Now listen here, Apple Bloom! There ain't no monsters, all right?! Time to stop bein' such a baby, and time to get to sleep! Which is ALL I wanna do, but you're keepin' me from it! Why can't y'all be sensible and reasonable and get that there aren't any monsters or creatures or odd things or creepy ponies waiting to pounce on you?!

APPLE BLOOM:  
(looks a little taken aback) I…I just wanna be safe…

(APPLEJACK's look softens and she sighs in defeat)

APPLEJACK:  
All right, sugarplum. I'll stay with you all night.

APPLE BLOOM:  
Ya will?

APPLEJACK:  
Truly honestly. I'll make sure no monsters hurt my baby sister.

(APPLEJACK chuckles and gives APPLE BLOOM a kiss on the forehead)

APPLE BLOOM:  
Monsters can be scary  
But my sister can be tough  
I know she's takin' care of me,  
And really that's enough!

APPLEJACK:  
Heh. Thanks, Apple Bloom…

APPLE BLOOM:  
(yawns sleepily) No problem, sis…after all, those monsters can be scary, but when you're angry, it's like a volcano erupts or somethin'…

APPLEJACK:  
Apple Bloom! Y'all take that back!

APPLE BLOOM:  
G'night sis…I think y'all should get some sleep.

APPLEJACK:  
But—why—you—heh. You're right…Night, Apple Bloom.

(APPLEJACK blows out the light and the lights fade. A faint shadow of the maniacal laugh is heard again.)


End file.
